I’m 32 years old and haven’t figured out exactly what I want to do with my life professionally.
I think I know. I thought I knew. But life constantly changes, and so do I.
I perceive pressure from society.
I put a ton – that’s an understatement – of pressure on myself.
I know worrying about it and obsessing over it won’t make it better.
I try. Maybe I try too hard.
I think. Maybe I overthink.
Maybe I’m rushing. Maybe I’m forcing it. Maybe I’m trying to fit somewhere I don’t fit. Maybe I’m looking in the wrong places.
What am I missing? What am I not seeing? What don’t I know?
I try to be patient but grow impatient. I try to trust the process but grow frustrated.
Am I doing the best I can? Am I dedicating enough time and energy? Am I focused? Am I focused on the right thing?
Whatever I’m doing isn’t cutting it. It’s not good enough. I’m a capable of more and better. I’m not living up to my potential. I have more to offer.
Some things in life have come naturally and easily to me. This is not one of them.
It’s hard for me. So hard. I’ve been struggling with the same issue for years.
I spent a lot of time working on myself and building my personal life. The hard work paid off. I’m thriving personally. I’m healthy. I’m at peace. I’m happy.
I want to thrive professionally. It’s important to me. I have to commit to it just like I did with my personal life.
This missing piece keeps me up at night. It haunts me. I want it so bad.
I’ve been relentlessly searching and persistently pursuing.
Maybe I’m chasing it and scaring it away.
Maybe I have to be more patient and wait longer. Maybe I have to let it come to me. Maybe I have to work harder and make it happen. Maybe I have to take control and go get it.
The unknowns. The uncertainty. The questions. The doubts. The maybes.
This is my journey. This is my quest. This is my life. I will continue. I will overcome. I will conquer.
The opportunity will come. I will be ready.
My day will come.